Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Pink Floyd vs The Most Adorable Animals at The Zoo.

Last weekend, I took Snappy to the zoo on Nature Trail day! The Nature Trail at the SF ZOO is a little area of the Children's Zoo where volunteer Junior Keepers show you pettable (and not so pettable) animals. The Kiddie Keepers had all memorized a list of facts about their animal. For example: "This is Frank. He is a tortoise. He has a shell that is connected to his spine. He is twenty-three years old."

This tortoise is her bitch.

Now Snappy, fresh off of her first year of successful speech therapy since we first started trying to fix her unintelligible speech when she was two, and also being a bit of a chatterbox, took these animal introductions as an invitation to introduce the only animal that matters, her cat. I'll  use these adorable animal pictures to describe exactly* how it went down.

Oh really? Your fucking tortoise has claws?

My cat uses his to scratch the ottoman and not his scratching post because he's a bad ass.

Your ferret is soft? Fuck you. That's not soft. 

This motherfucker is soft!

Oh really? I can pet your fucking Hedgehog? You know who else I can pet?
This Bitch! That's right. He sleeps on a doll bed. Like a boss.
Your bunny's name is Flopsy? That name sucks. You know what name doesn't suck?
Pink Floyd. Memorize it, fool.
* Only without quite so much swearing. But you get the idea.


Steve Finnell said...

you are invited to follow my blog

babypusher said...

Fuck you Steve. You are invited to kiss my ass. Mr. Spamsalot.